Goodbye, My Colleagues!

         It has been my pleasure knowing you and giving each other support for our professional growth.  As we are about to move on into our different specializations, I would like to take this opportunity to wish everyone of you all the best as you continue your professional path.  If you have the interest and desire to visit China or work in China as an early childhood professional, do contact me:  kokboonwww@yahoo.com.

Stage of Adjourning

As I have said it before that I have been involving in a number of groups, particularly group projects.  In fact, I prefer to work in a group, rather than to work alone by myself.   In a group setting, you accomplish more and work more effective, attaining success more easily than being working alone all by yourself. 

I am so fortunate that I have a regular team to work with for different projects, without much going through to the forming, norming and stages.  We have to do a lot of brainstorming during the storming stage for a new project.  And, in the performing stage, we have to make sure the project is on time and within budget. Among all the stages of group development, I enjoy the time in the adjourning period, when we can celebrate success and accomplishment that we have achieved.  Each success we achieve makes our team to be more norming and performing.  We have formulated our team rules and systems of planning and execution. 

However, as far as I am concerned, it is hardest to leave from the groups that are high performing when compared to groups that have clearest established norms.  In a high-performing group, there is an atmosphere of mutual trust and respect, and each member is highly motivated to achieve success for the group.  When encountering a conflict, the team members can work through it and come to a consensus easily.  On the contrary, clearest established norms groups are at the beginning stage to work more effectively as a team.  They are yet to learn to trust and rely on each other to get the job done.  Their interdependent relationships are at the initial stage.

Adjourning is an essential stage of teamwork simply because evaluation and reflection that done in the stage would help members to develop personally and professionally.   It is good time for the team to evaluate and capture best practices for future use.  

Conflict Resolution

Conflict can happen every day, at any time, at any place, on every people.  I have been encountering a lot of conflicts, particularly in the work place, when there are disputes in goals, beliefs, and ideas.

Recently, a staff had a conflict with me in terms of what resources should be used for our kitchen.  For example, I told him that we needed to get a larger volume of cooking oil, as we consume a lot of it every day in our cooking for children and staff.  But, he told me that the supplier did not have the supply of the larger quantity.  I then asked him to look for other suppliers who could supply a larger volume of cooking oil.  And I told him that I had been telling him about this for a couple of times.  This issue has not been rectified at once and left unattended.  After hearing what I had just said, he was provoked and got upset.  He angrily told me that he has been working very hard for the center, but was not appreciated and valued by me, who was his supervisor.  He felt that he did not feel happy working in this center and was displeased of the working system here.  I then sarcastically told him that he could quit if he felt this was not the right place for him to work.  I guess my statement inflamed his outrage and anger.  He then shouted at me, “I quit!!” and walked off. 

Having studied this week lesson, and when I recall the conflict I had with my staff, I realized that my communication with the staff had some violent contents, such as being judgmental and condemning.  Nonviolent Communication teaches that we should be empathically listening and honestly expressing as we communicate with others.  Nonviolent communication is not about getting others to do what we demand.  It is about creating a quality of connection that gets everyone’s needs met through compassionate giving and receiving.  This will be a powerful strategy to prevent latent tension to develop into overt conflict! 

Another strategy I have learned that might help me to manage the conflict is to use Conflict Resolution Skills, being proposed by Conflict Resolution Network (n.d.).  For example, win-win approach, one of the Conflict Resolution Skills, is a skill that to make both parties in communication to be winners—I want to win and I want you to win too.  This strategy brings both parties to go back to the underlying needs, with recognition of individual differences.  The most of all, this strategy helps to attack the problems, not the people.  Hence, I believe if I use the win-win approach with my staff, he would not experience the separateness, disconnectedness, or being denied by me and others.  Rather, he would sense togetherness and willingly to work out solution for mutual gain. 

Reference

Conflict Resolution Network. (n.d.). CR kit. Retrieved from http://www.crnhq.org/pages.php?pID=12#skill_3

Being a Communicator in a Diverse World

       O’Hair and Wiemann (2012) said that cultural factors, such as age, gender, religious beliefs, sexual orientation, even where we grow up, impact our perception and the perception of others.  Because of the different perceptions, there are some similarities and differences between how we evaluated ourselves as a communicator and how others evaluated us. 

       Communication is a more much complex, transactional process, being expressed through language, nonverbal behaviors, cultural understandings, and even unintentional reactions.  As a result, if messages are sent not appropriately or effectively, the receiver will perceive them wrongly, and will misunderstand or misjudge the sender. 

       In the evaluation, I did not aware that others perceived me as being timid to speak out publicly, or avoid talking to people that I do not know well.  It could be my nonverbal cues have made others to interpret wrongly.  Thus, even I have the tendency to speak out in some contexts, my behaviors of being of quiet instead of proactive, leading others to think that I am reluctant to do public speaking. 

       Two insights gained about communication in this week study.  The first one is that perception plays in the communication process is critical to our success as communicators.  Therefore, we need to aware how we communicate and understand how others view us as a communicator.  By doing so, we are alert and be reflective in our role as an early childhood professional.  The second insight gained is that cultural differences have a strong impact in influencing our perception.  Each of communicator brings his or her culture to the process of communication.  We need to accept the reality of the uniqueness of perception each one has.  Once we can identify and learn to understand the differences of these perceptions, we can become be more sensitive and mindful when communicating with others, particularly to young children and their families.  Eventually, the wellbeing of young children will be fostered when communication is effective and appropriate. 

Reference:

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction. New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.